Guanacaste, San Jose, and Arenal: Two Months in Costa Rica

May 4th, 2020

It's been almost two months since we escaped the godforsaken hellhole known to normies as the United States. Turns out we got out just in time too, since a "global pandemic"1 came along a week later and finally gave the USG the pretense it needed to put all of the serfs on indefinite house arrest2.

Costa Rica is much dryer now than when I visited in October. During Semana Santa3 we mostly had to entertain ourselves around the property. At times this included walks around the neighborhood close to sunset when the air was starting to get a bit cooler, usually followed by a quick dip in the pool before dinner.

A gaggle of geese. We gave a wide berth as we passed, not wanting to provoke these avian Goodfellas.

Junkyard cat, protecting the junk from any would-be thieves.

Just before Semana Santa we also made a quick trip down to San Jose4 to visit MP and his harem. Hannah gave us good intel on where to go for shopping so the following day we spent the morning walking around downtown San Jose. This was just at the start of the virus hysteria so things still seemed normal, save for the staff at shop entrances standing by to goop your hands as you enter and exit.

The public park was closed off with caution tape, a few cops idly standing around.

Catedral Metropolitana.

We stayed at the AC Hotel in Escazu. It was honestly one of the nicer hotels I've stayed in, anywhere, and it felt like we were the only guests there. The food provided by room service was excellent: Ceviche, steak and chicken skewers, pasta carbonara for a late lunch. Spanish baked egg casserole and a traditional American plate of eggs, bacon, and toast for breakfast. And of course a couple plates of Nutella crepes, fruit, and ice cream as a late night snack to restore some of the calories burned just prior to bed.

Some of the food mentioned above. I really need to get better about remembering to take pictures of the more appetizing meals set in front of me.

The cat came along as well, seen here in her camo vest.

Most recently, last week we took a trip up to Arenal to beat the heat. As dry as it is in most of Costa Rica during the high season5, Arenal is lush green year round. We stayed at a charming boutique hotel in Nueve Arenal called The Gingerbread Restaurant and Hotel. The owner and chef, Eyal, has been running the place for 14 years. There are three standard rooms upstairs from the bar/restaurant and three miniature cabins nearby on the property. The cabin we stayed in was great and the food was some of the best I've had in the country so far. During our two night stay we had chicken schnitzel, steak, seafood pasta, lamb "kebabitas", tuna poke, mushrooms in cream sauce, shrimp fried rice, scrambled eggs with goat cheese and truffle oil, along with freshly baked banana bread, apple strudel, chocolate cake, and bread pudding6.

The forest themed room we stayed in had this unique shower that made you feel like you were showering in the rain—in a small, sunny clearing in the middle of the forest.

We took a walk up the hill of a little gated neighborhood next door to the hotel in order to get a few more shots of the surrounding scenery.

Hoes love flowers, it's a fact.

And now we're all back in Guanacaste, watching the sun come through the trees in the early morning and drinking pipa fria7 in the hot afternoons. It's a simple life, but I'll take it over being locked in an apartment any day.

  1. Who knew something with a mortality rate of less than a tenth of a percent could be considered a pandemic? []
  2. The Costa Rican government derped about as well to some degree, including closing its borders to foreigners, closing its beaches and national parks, and imposing China-like driving restrictions based your license plate number. []
  3. Holy Week, or, Easter. Here Easter is taken more seriously and nearly all of Costa Rica slows to a crawl for an entire week starting April 5th. []
  4. Escazu and Santa Ana more specifically. []
  5. When all the tourists from colder climates come to escape their winters. []
  6. The last two served with ice cream of course. []
  7. Speaking of, the other day my groundskeeper's wife dropped by with a whole pitcher of the stuff, that they made fresh from coconuts dropped from trees on this very property. Probably $50 worth, in overinflated usian prices, but tasting far better than anything you could get there—at any price. []
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  1. Diana Coman says:

    That cat looks great!

  2. Hey, I'm taking the sluts out for slutware shopping Monday, wanna bring yours ?

  3. billymg says:

    Thanks for the invite, but going to have to pass this time. Contractors have started ripping up one of the cabinas here for a remodel so I need to be around as things come up.

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